Archive for the ‘Criminally Stupid’ Category

Instant Karma

Just add asshole
A London man was killed yesterday when he was struck by shards of glass as he knocked his girlfriend through the front window of a Banana Republic in West London.  Witnesses say the couple were arguing when he began shoving her into the shop front window, and that his final shove (literally) was [...]

A $300K OOPS!

Apparently domestic violence is a social gaffe
Chris Brown paid jeweler Jason of Beverly Hills $300,000 to create a tacky-ass necklace that reads “OOPS!” to wear as a form of public apology to P. Diddy’s (or whatever his nom de jour is today) Fourth of July party.  It’s good to see Brown is so understanding of [...]

Clerk to Robber: I’m Batsman!

He was bowled over by the robber’s stupidity

A man who attempted to rob a southern Alabama gas station on Saturday found himself in a bit of a sticky wicket when the clerk at whom he was pointing his gun happened to notice that its barrel contained an orange plastic tip. Stumped as to why the [...]

What the Crap!?

There’s a robber on the loose, so be on the look-out

Really, I can’t do more comedic justice to this story than the facts do, so here they are.
According to thedenverchannel.com, Boulder Police are looking for a a man who robbed Boulder Beer Emporium late Saturday night.  Shortly before midnight on June 27th, an Emporium employee [...]

Parents Just Don’t Understand

Will Smith was right, yet wrong
Many parents don’t seem to understand, but what they don’t understand is how to be a parent.  Here’s a knee slapper of an example.  Newly unemployed Phoenix mom, Cynthia Roberson was broke and out of ideas–until, seemingly, she took a look at her last name and noticed it held the [...]

Octomom Has Competitor for My Disaffection

Wrath might be a deadly sin, but a brick’s a deadly weapon.

Recently, Faiso Sahil, a Somalian born mother-of-five living in Bristol, UK, was hospitalized during a high-risk pregnancy with twins. After what she felt was a lengthy stay during which she had asked for labour to be induced and was refused, she allegedly became bored, [...]

Doosh Watch 2009

Too Much at Stake Edition
Listen up ladies, there’s a new brand of Doosh on the shelves and it’s “[Vampyre], Satanist, Wrestler, Politician, Stalker and Cry Baby” scented.  I hope you’re duly impressed.  His name is John Alfred Sharkey, but YOU WILL call him The Impaler!  ::Cue thunderclap::  Here he is in all his lived-in-his-parents’-basement-too-long glory.

This [...]

Mugshop of the Week

Star Wars Edition
Each week we’ll bring you our own special take on one of The Smoking Gun’s Mugshots of the Week.   Here’s this week’s:

When 900 years old you reach, look as good you will not, hmmm?
I bet they had to take her(?) by force…

The original can be found here.